August 18, 1973
FortBonifacio
Makati, Rizal
Ms. Maria Elena C. Aquino
25 Times St. Quezon City
My dearest Ballsy,
I write you this letter with tears in my eyes and as if steel fingers are
crushing my heart because I wanted so much to be with you as you celebrate
your legal emancipation. Now that you have come of age, my love, a voice
tells me that I am no longer young and suddenly, I feel old.
An old poet gave this advice very long ago “when you are sad, remember the
roses will bloom in December.” I want to send you bouquet of roses, big
red roses from my dreamland garden. Unfortunately for the present, my
roses are not in bloom, in fact they have dropped all their petals and
only the thorns are left to keep me company. I do think it is fitting to
send you a thicket of thorns on this memorable day!
I am very proud of you because you have inherited all the best traits of
your mother. You are sensible, responsible, even-tempered and sincere with
the least pretenses and affection which vehemently detest in a woman. I am
sure like your mother, you will possess that rare brand of silent courage
and that combination of fidelity and fortitude that will be the life vest
of your man in the tragic moments of his life.
During my lonely hours of solitary confinement in FortMagsaysay, Laur,
Nueva Ecija last March and April with nothing else to do but pray and
daydream, with only my fond memories to keep me company, I planned a
weekend barrio fiesta for you in Tarlac for your 18th birthday. I fooled
myself into believing that my ordeal would end with the fiscal year. I
planned to invite all your classmates and friends and their families for
the weekends.
The schedule called for an early departure by bus from Manila and the
first stop will be Concepcion, where lunch will be served by the pool. And
after lunch, you were to visit the SantaRitaElementary School to
distribute cookies and ice cream to the children of that public school
where you were first enrolled.
I guess sheer nostalgia prompted me to include Santa Rita. We were only
three then: Mommie, you and I. Those were the days of happy memories
little responsibilities, tremendous freedom, a great future ahead and
capped by a fulfillment of love.. You are the first fruit of our union,
the first proof of our love and the first seal of our affections.
From Concepcion we were to proceed to Luisita for the barrio fiesta. I
intended to invite a friend who could roast an entire cow succulently.
Swimming, pelota, dancing and eating would have been the order of the day.
Sunday morning was reserved for a trip around the Hacienda and the mill
and maybe golf for some of the parents and later a picnic-lunch on Uncle
Tony’s Island. Return to Manila after lunch. I am afraid this will have to
remain as one of the many dreams I had in Laur.
Our future has suddenly become uncertain and our fate unknown. I am even
now beginning to doubt whether I’ll ever be able to return to you and the
family. Hence, I would like to ask you these special favors.
Love your mother, whose love for you, you will never be able to match. She
is not the greatest mother in the world, she is your sincerest friend.
Take care of your younger sisters and brother and lavish them with the
love and care I would like to continue giving them but am unable to do so.
Help Noy-noy along and pray hard that he will grow to be a real,
responsible man who in later years will protect you all.
You are the model for your three younger sisters. Your responsibility is
therefore great. Please endeavor to live up to our highest expectations.
Be more tolerant to Pinky, more accessible to Viel, our little
genius-princess, and more charitable to Krissy, our baby doll, and make up
for my neglect.
Finally, forgive me, my love, for not having been an ideal, good and
thoughtful father to you all as I pursued public office. I had hopes and
high resolve of making up, but I am afraid my destiny will not oblige.
I seal this letter with a drop of tear and a prayer in my heart, that
somehow, somewhere we shall meet again and I will finally be able to make
up for all my lapses, in the kingdom where justice reigns supreme and love
is eternal.
I love you,
Dad
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